'Ashtanga is crazy inside crazy!' & Poo!

Quoting David Swenson: “People from outside yoga think yogis are crazy, but people inside yoga think ashtangis are crazy! So, basically, Ashtanga is crazy inside crazy!”

I have been away from London for 2 ½ months now.and I’ve immersed myself in Ashtanga. My life here has been so far removed from anything back home. A comparison of myself 2 years ago to today - I’m surprised my friends and family haven’t disowned me as a ‘raving nutter’.

Sandra and I were talking over lunch last week; yes one of those organic, vegan, raw food places – and I love it! We were talking about what people must think when they look in from the outside...

Well, in Gokulam, a suburb in Mysore, West of Bangalore, India, there is every nationality you could think of. My friends so far have been from Thailand, Canada, Mexico, Venezuela, Chile, Australia, India, Russia, South Korea, Norway...the list goes on.

We are all here for a sole purpose, one intention, to wake up before sunrise and practice the age old practice of Ashtanga. Our whole day is focused on these 2 hours; right from our sleep pattern, our eating habits and our toilet routines. I have never spoken about poop so much in my life – the colour, texture, frequency, what foods help a bowel movements, what foods inhibit my trips to the bathroom, special teas to drink...you get the picture.

Because of course we all want to be ‘empty’ - that little bit lighter when we’re folding forward, backward bending, twisting. Basically when our digestive organs are being rung out like a wet dish cloth!

We set our alarms at a time that is not even considered as ‘morning’ by some people back home, wait out in the cold (yes India is cold in the morning) until our names are called and we pack ourselves into a shala. Thankfully, I’m with Saraswathi so things are a more relaxed and at a pace more suited to the ‘Primary Ashtangi’ in me. Saraswathi has an understanding of female Ashtangis and how a women’s body and needs change at various points of her life - A maternal vibe I'm warming too. I have however heard stories of waiting out in the cold for hours in order to get a space for ‘one small one’ in the main shala and then having to practice in either a closet or the bathroom :(

I won’t go into the  whole etiquette of shala practice but just to give you an idea of the sound inside a shala here is a brief clip of Mr Vader; giving you a comical idea of the breathing.

I am weird, but I love it J

Thank you to all those who have stuck by me, loved and supported me throughout this journey - 'Baby I was born this way.'

Practice and all is coming!

Well after a much needed rest in Hampi I returned to Mysore on the sleeper bus; 13 hours of hell with the craziest of drivers; I wouldn’t be surprised if he was wanted by the Karnataka Transport police. Any non-Indian, when they hear a horn go hooooooooooooooooooooonk, driving full speed and then hitting the breaks on the ‘motorway’ would be terrified. That’s when the melatonin came in handy.

I stayed my 1^st night in a pre-arranged room via Air BNB. This Air BNB booking was nothing like my previous (the gorgeous house with swimming pool in Pondicherry!) The room was a garage! It was clean but had no windows, just a large metal door. It was freezing at night and I heard everything outside! Not good when your bedtime has changed to 8pm L Apart from my yoga-centered problems, my bedroom was not upstairs with the other yogis, it was in the main house with an elderly Indian couple. It was made very clear that I was not to use the kitchen (despite this being stated on the Air BNB profile, ‘Use of the kitchen and utensils is allowed, we just remind you to please treat these as though they were your own.’ On top of this, I felt very uncomfortable in the mornings, waking up early when their bedroom has no door, only curtains, I must have disturbed them, switching on my light, unlocking all the bolts to the living room etc. So I found another place, across the road from the main Shala. It’s on a main road, but hey I lived on Abbey Road for 3 ½ years so this is fine J

My 1^st day with Saraswathi:

I set my alarm for 3:50am, waking was no problem. I made myself a lemon tea and prepared with a few sun salutations and shoulder exercises in order to open my chest, just as the Dr ordered. My start time is 6am so I left the house in plenty of time. There walking towards me was Asha my Pranyamama teacher from the YTTC. She didn’t remember my name of course but called ‘England’ instead. She was out with her husband on their ‘morning walk’ and invited me to tea this week – the kindness of this women always makes me smile inside J My friend Sandra (A Chilean lady connected to the lovely Leo) had shown me Saraswathi’s Shala the day before but I still managed to get lost. No fear though, a local on his morning walk took me there. On the stairs we all waited in a line until our time was called. As I reached the top of the stairs I peered in and I could see others, Saraswathi weaving in and out shouting ‘You catch?’ ‘Which one you do?’ ‘backbend then finish’

…’Next!’ 

It was my turn. I went in and tried to place my things in what I now know is her office. An assistant stopped me and said that I was to put my mat down and the gestured to put my belongings in the changing room. I did just that and then whilst in Virabhadrasana B this morning I saw that I have been using the male changing rooms! Opps! I whispered my prayer and proceeded with Surya Namaskra A. I was so preoccupied with remembering the sequence that I couldn’t relax, each asana seemed a struggle and somehow disjointed from the previous. I got to Supta Kurmasana and then felt a foot on my calf. My head was down between my legs so I couldn’t see anything and then I heard ‘leg down, this go here’. After hearing so many rumors that adjustments are non-existent, Saraswathi was helping me on my 1^st day. I wasn’t able to catch but this was the 1^st time I had got into the posture without modifying! Yay me! ‘You stop here and then backbend, we work on this again tomorrow’.

Before leaving I bowed with my hands namaskara. Saraswathi spotted me, she nodded and smiled. So well done to me, first day over and my shoulder felt fine. 

In the words of Sri K. Pattabhi Jois,
"Practice and all is coming."

I have been away as a lone traveler many times in the past 4 years; all over Europe, Indonesia, North America and even India but this time things feel different. This will be the longest time I have been away and I have mixed feelings. I miss everyone at home, for sure, that’s a given. But it’s more than that. I guess it has something to do with Christmas and the matter of only being back in the UK for a few days before flying out again. There is no hint of Christmas here, other than the Westerners’’ isle in Loyal World shopping centre. This is how I like it; no mad rushing to see people, no gluttonous eating and drinking, no spending stupid amounts of money on gifts people don’t need in order to ‘show’ them your love… But I’m looking on Facebook and I can see people decorating their Christmas trees, wearing their novelty jumpers, rehearsing school nativity plays etc and I’m thinking about my relationships with those at home…

Nevertheless, I’m doing what I love and I’m far from Oxford Street.

This is my stepping stone

Saturday morning arrived and after an intensive week of theory and teaching exams all that was left was a final morning of Mysore practice. Somehow I felt more nervous for this moment. The Shala was filled with emotion as everyone was aware this would be the last day we would practice together. Inhale, 'vande gurunam caranaravinde...' I had set up my mat next to my friend Sandra, and with every inhale and exhale our bodies flowed in synchronicity to the vinyasas.

Finishing my 25th count of Uttpluthi I knelt on my mat, bowed my head and with hands in Namaskara I whispered the closing prayer - 'May the whole of all the world's be happy.'

One by one we rolled up our mats and congragated on the roof terrace. Mayanne and I hugged, as she shed a few tears. No one really said anything but we all felt something:

"Listen to your being. It is continuously giving you hints; it is a still, small voice. It does not shout at you, that is true. And if you are a little silent you will start feeling your way." OSHO

We acknowledged our feelings and then took our teacher Praveen for a Chai and a chat about our aspirations for the future. Then came the graduation ceremony. As with any Western education, you pay for the course and you'll get the certificate. I got mine, along with everyone else on the course.

So I now have a certificate stating that I have fulfilled the requirements of a 200hr Ashtanga YTTC. This is my stepping stone. The journey will now begin.

I found myself in a bit of a dilemma with regard to my place at KPJAYI. An existing injury has resurfaced, caused from years of swimming and incorrect posture. The tendons and ligaments in deltoid, mastoid and pectorals have shortened causing my shoulders to round forward. This is really prominent in the right and makes a horrid crunching sound. Well it got quite bad a couple of weeks ago and I've had to see an advanced physiotherapist. I have had to refrain from Marichayasana and Budjupadasana, modifying to a minimal posture :(

Recently I've heard things about KPJAYI, all of which are from people who have never actually practiced with either Sharath or Saraswathi so I know a substantial amount is bullshit. But I'm quite scared. I've heard that if you can't bind in Marichayasana D or jump through you are simply told to roll up your mat and are refunded.

After all my anxieties I finally emailed my teacher from London. She calmed me, highlighting that this is an experience to embrace and an opportunity that I will be sure to regret if I don't take it. Leo and I then met his friend and her teacher from Ashtanga Yoga Chile - both practicing under Sharath. Such kind people and very comforting to know that I have friends around me. My mind was made. I did it, I registered with Saraswathi. Now my excitement grows each day as I spends hours at night reading blogs.

Me and another girl have taken a sleeper train to Hampi, UNESCO site. I'm hoping that a few days of resting my body will leave me feeling fresh and rejuvenated for my return to Mysore; ready for the next stepping stone!